By Judith Gayle

I WRITE this on the first day of May, a month assigned to celebration of the lush prospects of abundance and awakening fertility. Because of unexpected snow flurries in the Pea Patch, the earlier buds and beginning blooms of this season were killed off. Today, I have a single but lovely iris adding color to my yard. So much for lush -- piddling, is more like it. You won't find me dancing around any May poles today -- I will go speak kindly to the deva of my little flower, and I might sway and hum a little when I thank it for blessing me by showing up as a lonely sentinel to spring. Seems a little desperate, though -- almost seems as if I'm trying to pull May in by the tail as it lopes down the road without me, trying to make it happen so I can see it.

Maybe it's just me. I could use a dramatic spring display, could do with a little sensory uplift. In the last months, it seems that no matter what happens next, nothing changes. It feels like we're pushing a boulder uphill, slipping every third or fourth step and having to reposition ourselves. Feels like nothing's moving, not even the seasons. Maybe I'm feeling too worn out to dance. Or maybe I'm just reacting to the full Wesak moon, intense and a bit dark in Scorpio and squared in a Grand Cross by the Sun, Saturn and Neptune in fixed signs.

When I think of fixed signs, I think of Mr. Bush's Leo rising, and remember that those who fail to mature on their life's journey more often resemble their personality signal than their Sun sign characteristics. I heard a well-respected White House correspondent say last week that the only person holding up a change of course in Iraq is George Bush himself; everyone else is willing to look at options. We've got one wounded and petulant lion, blocking the way.

In the last years, George Bush has been the boulder many of us have been trying to push up the hill, and in the last months of awakening public opinion, he's the immovable object that has us all weary. He told the Congress last week not to "test his will." The direction that the majority of the American public, the Democratic Congress, and the larger portion of military and political advisers have chosen -- and that’s not even taking into account world opinion -- is a direct challenge to Mr. Bush's will, and he'll have none of it, thank you. Frankly, it's a little absurd that one man can hold so many on this planet hostage to his own ill-informed opinion. A good thing to keep in mind next time we vote.

In past years and other administrations, circumstances have conspired to create those politically pragmatic moments in which leaders change their minds. In these last years, though, circumstances have continued to unfold in bloodshed, corruption, scandals, constitutional and legal challenges and instances of outright lying, and nothing seems to change. I looked up Mr. Bush's ascendant in the Sabian Symbols, looking for a hint to explain this conundrum -- I found one.

Leo at 7 degrees -- A communist activist spreading his revolutionary ideals.

Well. Yes, I'd say that's the description of an immovable object; we will have to become an irresistible force.

And we can be comforted that on this fourth anniversary of Bush's "Mission Accomplished" speech, the energy of revolution continues to build. Bill Moyers exposed the media's complicity in the rush to war last week on PBS (you can watch it here), and former CIA director, George Tenet, confirmed the administration’s determination to sell its war using whatever means were available. Dick Cheney was protested and booed again at Brigham Young University, and Alberto Gonzales received a similar welcome at Harvard. Meanwhile, an unpopular wall being built in Iraq as an attempt to keep Muslim sects separated shows us how few options Bush has to offer. The Congress is issuing subpoenas for scandal after scandal and seem finally willing to use the word impeachment, while state governments gather votes for such an action. Grassroots groups are organizing and growing, May Day demonstrations are going on as I write, and there are hopeful signs for a growing green industry, with corporations both large and small jumping on board and willing to collaborate for the environment.

There is plenty bubbling just below the surface, awaiting the astrological energies that will turn it up to a boil in the coming months -- it's just a challenge to keep moving ahead cheerfully when so little seems to have changed. Keep faith in things unseen...like, for me this year, spring.

I'm reminded that on the occasion of the Wesak moon, millions of Buddhists celebrate the birth, death and enlightenment of the Buddha. They gather in devotional practice across the world, especially in occupied Tibet, and seek to touch the divine. This year, that Moon made a rare alignment with the sabbat of Beltane, the "bright fire" celebrated by Pagans everywhere -- the "joining of God and Goddess." That's an enormous amount of hopeful energy to gather over our heads, collect in our hearts, and prompt a great cry of gratitude and yearning to lift off the planet into the ether. Think of the power of millions of people entering into a sacrament -- think of the collective intention of life-affirming force, gathered around us today to infect us with optimism. Think of the light spreading out to connect us all together as we welcome in the promise of growth and warmth and renewal.

Now that, my dears, is a real "surge" -- of life.

So, OK -- I can change my mind even if Bush can't. I'll celebrate Spring even though she's spare this year and almost invisible. I'll affirm peace even though I don't see it or hear it yet. And I'll keep working to change the trappings of death that Mr. Bush and his fellows wear so comfortably to something lighter and finer that will rest more joyfully on my nation and the world. The power of life, moving along passionately, sparking love and beauty, unstoppable in its primal intensity, is the kind of irresistible force that even big dumb rocks can't resist.

It's Wesak. It's Beltane. It's holy week. It's spring. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go dance with my iris -- because it's the first day of May.


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